Rapture really DID happen

Okay, all you Rapture-haters out there.  Here is the proof.  It did happen.  To a select few.  It's just that you and I sin a leeeeettle bit too much and have not been selected in this first round heaven draft (don't despair - there's always the walk-on spot).  For those living under a rock, Family Radio preacher Harold Camping has been predicting that 200 million believers would be sucked up in a mass-vacuum to heaven - and that day was to be May 21, 2011.  The rest of us heathens would be rocked in a massive earthquake then would suffer 5 months of tribulation before the end of the world.  

Some of the more virtuous did go "poof" up to heaven yesterday, and the photos below are indisputable.

Obviously, this was a very bad, bad, bad dog (that didn't deserve to go to heaven)

That must have been decaf

In my opinion, anyone who is so bold as to wear denim not only on the bottom but on top as well deserves entry

I sure hope these two weren't living in sin

Though an internationally-acclaimed photojournalist, I can't take credit for those photos above.  However, I did happen to be at a cocktail party full of surgeons, and witnessed their ascent to the afterlife firsthand.  And whipped out my iPhone just in time to catch this shot:

Okay, okay, you got me...I was just doing my laundry

Obamaville, Ireland?

Moneygall, a, um, medium-sized city in Ireland (population 298 - that's two hundred ninety eight, not two hundred ninety eight thousand) has turned into a carnival of sorts in preparation for Barack Obama's visit.  Barack's great great great great grandfather was born here. Since the announcement of President Obama's tour of Moneygall, the town has been busy making itself more Obama-friendly.  Some of the transformations this town has undergone:

1. Renamed the town newspaper "The Offaly Independent" to "The Obama Independent"

2. Broke ground on Barack Obama Plaza in the center of this one-block town

3. Grand opening of Barack Obama Cafe

4. Added a Barack Obama exit off the highway, so that you don't miss this little hamlet

5. Selling Obama Brown Bread - hey...is that a little racist???  More accurate would be, say, swirled pumpernickel perhaps?

6. Souvenier shops have sprung up, selling not only Obama clocks, magnets, lighters but t-shirts too.  My prediction for top-selling tee? "O'bama IS Feidir Linn" (translation: "Yes We Can")  

7. My favorite part? Guinness headquarters has sent a master beer-pouring expert to Ollie Hayes' Moneygall pub, where Barack Obama is expected to sip the brown brew (hmmm...another racial reference) - perhaps while reminiscing with townfolk about his distant (1/32nds relation) ancestor Fulmouth Kearney.  The pint of Guinness to be had by Mr. President has become known as "the most famous pint in Irish history"

The decor at Ollie's includes a bronze bust of Obama and lovely portraits of him on the walls.

How to blend in inconspicuously when vacationing

NOT!!!

People.  When you travel, take careful consideration of your vacay wardrobe.  What is the image you want to project? What statement are you trying to make with your outfit?  And do you really need to match your partner/wife/travel companion head to toe?

I wish I could have caught his ladyfriend in the photo too - but she was quick like a ninja.  She was in...you guessed it, grey/yellow sneakers, white clamdiggers, green polo and a hat.  Oh - and a brown she-version of the man-satchel.

At least this farmer's tan will just involve the arms.  Thank god for knee high dress socks.   And who knew the butt crack was such a handy place to tuck things you don't want to hold, like your fisherman's hat?  Ultimate hands-free.  It's like Snooki's bosom, but in reverse. 

How did this man find a cap that matched his carnation-hued pants so perfectly?  He rules.

I really need to invent something to conceal my iPhone better for these stealth pictures...like a secret cutout in my Us Magazine.  Keep your eyes peeled in a future post.  Heading into the laboratory right now...

Dog...er...on a rope?

German Shepherd Stringing Christmas Lights?  Bungee-Jumping Canines?

When I pictured the Special Forces storming Bin Laden's super secret hiding place in Pakistan, I never imagined seeing dogs dangling from a rope as part of the image.  But alas - here it is.  These dogs not only dangle from helicopters, they have oxygen masks for the 25,000-foot descent, ballistic body armour, protective gear that shields them from shrapnel and gunfire and infrared night-sight cameras mounted on their heads.  Talk about Pimp My Dog (Xhibit? Where art thou?).  Somehow I think the dog beds featured in the guest post on smallshop.com are just a leeetle too frou-frou for these killers.  What I'd like to see next is a German Shephard in white camo snowboarding down the Alps with a machine gun strapped to its head, a la James Bond.  Now that I'd pay to see.

Read more about these pups on The Sun.

If you rock some serious style, so should your pup...

TWNH had the honor of being design maven smallshop's guest blogger extraordinaire for a day.  Some people might say, noooooo, TWNH, you are too goofy, too crass, too whatever to be a guest blogger.  And those people are right.  However, I snuck a roofie into smallshop chief bloggo's martini (served up in way-cooler-than-you vintage martini glasses, of course) and somehow convinced her to let me infiltrate smallshop for a day.

Check it out here.  Enjoy your dose of canine chic for the day!